Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Of Dirty Laundry and Dilaudid

You know you're a runner when:
  • You transfer some laundry from the washing machine to the dryer, and there are safety pins scattered about the bottom of the empty washer drum. Similarly, you open the door to your dryer, and a handful of safety pins falls out. I have the cleanest safety pins in the world.
  • You are lying supine on a gurney in a hospital ER, moaning and shaking and panting uncontrollably as the worst pain you've ever felt rips through your abdomen over and over and over, and the only thing you can think of is "I wonder if I can still go for my long run tomorrow?" Of course, once the sweet, sweet nectar that is Dilaudid hits your brain like a ten-ton truck, you won't be thinking about much of anything. (I yelled, "Now I know why people get addicted to drugs!" before I floated quietly away on a heavenly cloud of narcotic painkiller.)
Yes, I spent part of the weekend in the hospital. It meant that my Friday evening and all of Saturday were completely shot. I didn't have appendicitis nor did I have a kidney stone. I had a ruptured ovarian cyst. Guys, be glad this can never happen to you. It was dreadful, excruciating. I was sternly forbidden from running for at least two days. TWO WHOLE DAYS? I'm training here! (I should add another "you know you're a runner when": "everyone in the ER knows you're a distance runner within 20 minutes of being admitted because you're incapable of talking about anything else, espcially when you're actively training for a marathon.") It was difficult, but I managed. I managed by going to the beach on Sunday with a book and lying in the sun for a few hours reading about Bella and Edward and Jacob (if you have to ask...well, just don't). A little swimming, a little sunning...I let the memory of the drama of the previous 36 hours drift away and I returned home happily sunbaked. Monday morning I was back on the road. Yes, I'm fine. No, I didn't have to have surgery. For now....

Stupid female bits. *grumble*

12 comments:

Nitmos said...

"Ovarian cyst", yeah, right, like that's a real thing. Is it near the flux capacitor?

Hope you are better soon...and cruising at 88 mph before long!

girlrunningaround said...

Ouch. Sorry to hear that. I had the same thing happen to me a few years ago. Unbelievable pain! Rest up and feel better soon!

meganursula said...

doh! feel better quick.

Kristin said...

Hope you're feeling fine now! (And I know who Bella and Edward and Jacob are, and they're a fine way to pass some time!) I also know exactly what you mean about medical issues interfering with running, or vice versa--I have fibroids which are probably going to lead to surgery (for the second time) and I keep delaying going back for a new ultrasound because I don't want the potential surgery and recovery to interfere with the races I have planned for summer! Or fall!

alex said...

oh goodness- I know what you mean by all that- washer, dryer, and cysts.
I hear you loud and clear over here. May I suggest a hot water bottle for the pain?

Kirsten said...

Were it not for the standard 6 weeks of no running I'd have my uterus and at least one meatloaf ovary removed TODAY. Friggin' reproductive crap.

Hope you are feeling much better and have no more ovarian issues during this (or any other) training cycle.

MCM Mama said...

Owie! I hope you are feeling better and that you never get one of those evil things again. At least you got good drugs and had a good book to chill with...

D10 said...

I feel your pain. The same thing happened to me last year around this same time. Not fun at all. Luckily the pain goes away just as fast as it came. Glad you are ok.

Carolina John said...

IV narcotics are the best! i embraced all i could after my marathon.

Spike said...

as far as I can tell, all of your 'female' problems relate to you washing safety pins. I'm surprised the doctors didn't tell you to stop washing safety pins. seriously the medical profession just misses everything.

feel better soon!

Robert said...

Yikes, that's no fun. Glad you didn't have to have surgery, at least.

Karina said...

Funny--EXACT same thing I thought when the kid kicked my toenail clean off at the park. "I need that thing to run on, you jerk!" Only later, AND it hurts like a bi***!

Glad it was only 2 days missed--hope surgery is not in the offing.