Tuesday, February 24, 2009

I have no idea what you're talking about...(shifty eyes)

Seen at Zoomylicious; from Running Times.

What are the possible side effects of RUNNING?

RUNNING may produce side effects in some patients. In clinical studies, the most common side effects with RUNNING included: obsession with shoes; obsession with numbers; waste of brain power on arcane statistics; insensitivity to clothes that smell like ammonia; searing hamstring pain while driving; black toenails; purple toenails; no toenails; prepubescent biceps; loss of lateral movement; severe reduction in vertical leap; crow’s feet; smelly feet; antisociability; confusion about what constitutes an acceptable toilet; feelings of superiority toward people who don’t take RUNNING; confusion about how much others want to hear about RUNNING; potentially embarrassing public displays of appetite; inability to recognize that RUNNING on television is boring; misperception about how much flesh should be shown in public; excessive time spent reading RUNNING message boards; and extreme fatigue when spouse wants help around the house.

Too close to home:
In other news, today is Fat Tuesday and have I ever taken advantage. Someone brought in a metric buttload of pazcki and I have eaten three (two raspberry and one Boston cream).

Truthfully, I feel kind of sick.


Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

Okay. I was willing to overlook the other running-obsessed stuff.

But mentioning pazcki in mixed company is a bit over-the-top, don't you think?


tfh said...

I can blame my antisociability on running?


Spike said...

I rather enjoyed telling my coworkers, as we all sat around eating pazckis, that I will be destroying the calories I'm currently ingesting later this evening. Is that so wrong?

Sun Runner said...

GQH-- Apologize? NEVER! I shall pączek you in the pączki instead.

Spike-- Awesome way to make them all feel totally inferior. I think you're totally guilty of "feelings of superiority toward people who don’t take RUNNING."

I, OTOH, was all input and no output today WRT my own paczki consumption. Well, OK, I am going to go climb 80 flights of stairs for Climb Detroit practice in a few minutes. I guess that counts.

joyRuN said...

Oh, I have a reason for my superiority complex?


Kirsten said...

Ha, I have had one raspberry and 1 Boston Cream...but there are still 2 of each left...and I did run 14 miserable miles today...hmmmm.


Viper said...

Side effects also may include a perverse propensity toward over-capitalization of the word "running."