Monday, June 9, 2008

I Have Become That Which I Mocked

Let's go back in time. Many years ago (OK, it was the early 1990s) I used to shop at Abercrombie and Fitch. I really liked their clothing. It was sensible even though it was a little pricey. Then something happened (popularity) and the prices started going up and the clothing started shrinking. $60 for a T-shirt? I don't think so. Teeny tiny shorts that only a five-foot-two 90-pound teenager could wear? Yeah, right. The last thing I bought at A&F was a long-sleeved (men's) shirt in about 1998, a shirt which I have since bequeathed to John. Hey, it's still pretty stylish.

I'd walk past their store at the mall and while being aurally and olfactorally assaulted by the twin devils of too much cologne and really loud music, would cock an eye at the mannequins in the windows bedecked in the tiniest clothing and scoff, "Who the hell can wear that stuff?"

Fast-forward to Saturday afternoon. My favorite resale shop. I was on a mission. New shorts were desperately needed. I had been wearing the same pair of size 12 shorts for weeks. A belt was now required to keep them up. I grabbed everything that looked like it might fit me and headed to the dressing room.

A few minutes later I was staring at myself in the mirror, shocked, because I had just put on a pair of

size 4 (gasp)

Abercrombie and Fitch (GASP)


And they looked really, really good. OK, so the inseam is about an inch long but you know what? I've worked SO hard for these legs, so why not show them off? How many hundreds of miles have I run? I deserve those tiny shorts!

I bought them and three other pairs including size 4 shorts from the Gap. I also got some new jean shorts, aka "NASCAR shorts," whose sole purpose is to wear to a NASCAR race. It's like the required uniform. Daisy Dukes + bikini top = NASCAR fun!


chia said...

*insert insane happy dance here*

Welcome to the dark side. I hope to join you there sometime in this lifetime. If not, I'm still satisfied with my JCrew ;-).

Nitmos said...

Who can shop in A & F? I feel like an old man saying inside my head....Turn That Music Down!

Sarah said...

Who can shop in A & F?

Not me. The place gives me hives (maybe it's the miasma of cologne in the air). Hence the consignment shop. Someone else braved the tweener nightmare of A&F and then was so kind as to turn over their shorts to a used clothing store so a 30-something curmudgeon could buy them.

Laura said...

Is it wrong that I actually still wear A&F perfume? I bought it years ago but a bottle lasts forever, and I like it...